ARCADE GOON

5y

I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it. It was the chief.

“Bad news, detective. We got a situation.”

“What? Is the mayor trying to ban trans fats again?”

“Worse. Somebody just stole four hundred and forty-seven million dollars’ worth of bitcoins.”

The heroin needle practically fell out of my arm. “What kind of monster would do something like that? Bitcoins are the ultimate currency: virtual, anonymous, stateless. They represent true economic freedom, not subject to arbitrary manipulation by any government. Do we have any leads?”

“Not yet. But mark my words: we’re going to figure out who did this and we’re going to take them down … provided someone pays us a fair market rate to do so.”

“Easy, chief,” I said. “Any rate the market offers is, by definition, fair.”

He laughed. “That’s why you’re the best I got, Lisowski. Now you get out there and find those bitcoins.”

“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m on it.”

I put a quarter in the siren. Ten minutes later, I was on the scene. It was a normal office building, strangled on all sides by public sidewalks. I hopped over them and went inside.

“Home Depot™ Presents the Police!®” I said, flashing my badge and my gun and a small picture of Ron Paul. “Nobody move unless you want to!” They didn’t.

“Now, which one of you punks is going to pay me to investigate this crime?” No one spoke up.

“Come on,” I said. “Don’t you all understand that the protection of private property is the foundation of all personal liberty?”

It didn’t seem like they did.

“Seriously, guys. Without a strong economic motivator, I’m just going to stand here and not solve this case. Cash is fine, but I prefer being paid in gold bullion or autographed Penn Jillette posters.”

Nothing. These people were stonewalling me. It almost seemed like they didn’t care that a fortune in computer money invented to buy d**** was missing.

I figured I could wait them out. I lit several cigarettes indoors. A pregnant lady coughed, and I told her that secondhand smoke is a myth. Just then, a man in glasses made a break for it.

“Subway™ Eat Fresh and Freeze, Scumbag!®” I yelled.

Too late. He was already out the front door. I went after him.

“Stop right there!” I yelled as I ran. He was faster than me because I always try to avoid stepping on public sidewalks. Our country needs a private-sidewalk voucher system, but, thanks to the incestuous interplay between our corrupt federal government and the public-sidewalk lobby, it will never happen.

I was losing him. “Listen, I’ll pay you to stop!” I yelled. “What would you consider an appropriate price point for stopping? I’ll offer you a thirteenth of an ounce of gold and a gently worn ‘Bob Barr ‘08’ extra-large long-sleeved men’s T-shirt!”

He turned. In his hand was a revolver that the Constitution said he had every right to own. He fired at me and missed. I pulled my own gun, put a quarter in it, and fired back. The bullet lodged in a U.S.P.S. mailbox less than a foot from his head. I shot the mailbox again, on purpose.

“All right, all right!” the man yelled, throwing down his weapon. “I give up, cop! I confess: I took the bitcoins.”

“Why’d you do it?” I asked, as I slapped a pair of Oikos™ Greek Yogurt Presents Handcuffs® on the guy.

“Because I was afraid.”

“Afraid?”

“Afraid of an economic future free from the pernicious meddling of central bankers,” he said. “I’m a central banker.”

I wanted to coldcock the guy. Years ago, a central banker killed my partner. Instead, I shook my head.

“Let this be a message to all your central-banker friends out on the street,” I said. “No matter how many bitcoins you steal, you’ll never take away the dream of an open society based on the principles of personal and economic freedom.”

He nodded, because he knew I was right. Then he swiped his credit card to pay me for arresting him.

Womanpuncher69

5y

@ARCADE_GOON u know any socialist text that deal with financial/investment sectors or asset speculation ?

Womanpuncher69

5y

@ARCADE_GOON u know any socialist text that deal with financial/investment sectors or asset speculation ?

americana

5y

@krishna_bound OP of conservative thread was banned after some remarks in a thread related to transgender topics

americana

5y

@krishna_bound OP of conservative thread was banned after some remarks in a thread related to transgender topics

Scratchin Mamba

5y

DURKIO GONE?

americana

5y

Again

Scratchin Mamba

5y

DURKIO GONE?

Synopsis

5y

Wait who was he lol

americana

5y

@krishna_bound OP of conservative thread was banned after some remarks in a thread related to transgender topics

space0cadet

5y

was the op of the afghanistan thread too lol

space0cadet

5y

was the op of the afghanistan thread too lol

americana

5y

“Endless War in the Middle East” is such a dog whistle especially considering he was a neocon

ARCADE GOON

5y

Afghanistan aint even middle east

VA7a

5y

I’m trying to help my friend who is doing an assignment or the DPRK, does this make sense?
when you are looking at sources check and see if they’re from South Korea. South Korea is a direct enemy of the north and they often spread lies about the country because they are enemies. The Korean War puts a lot of things into context. And so does the Vietnam war!
The physical war ended in a stalemate but the political one still rages on. The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea are very isolationist and so A lot of things that have been stated about North Korea have been propagated by their very enemies which is still most of the western world.
South Korea and North Korea were united as one Korea before Japan and annexed them 1910 until the were forced in 1945 (after WW2) to split the land. One side was supported by capitalist countries like United States and the rest of the UN and the other side was supported by Socialist states USSR and China.
America really hates socialism because the entire point is to solve capitalism/to defeat it so that everyone is provided with their needs. Take what they did the the Black Panther Party, Malcolm X and Vietnam.
Vietnam had nothing to do with America after escaping form the oppressive colonialist hand of the French. But still because of the looming threat of communism they killed millions and spread Agent Orange around Vietnam.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Scare

https://youtu.be/efvTJUFQn7A

space0cadet

5y

Is this his assignment or your message to him lol

Cudderwalks

5y

Communist Party of Ecuador (Maoist) has announced it is preparing to embark upon people’s war against the reactionary state

Translation to English:

In response to Ecuador's declaration of a State of Fascist Emergency, the Front for the Defense of the People's Rights, an organization generated by the true Communist Party, declares war on the country's system of oppression and summons the masses to confrontation

"The call for the great mobilization was already launched on October 26th. Well, let's prepare, let's launch the entire contingent of the class, the poor peasantry and the oppressed masses on the roads, in the streets, let's surround the cities by the countryside, we have to do this, strangle the cities and to feel, above all, the fury of a peasantry who, like the proletariat at this moment, has nothing to lose but a world to gain."
.
Let us prepare our ranks for the glorious People's War!
The rebellion is justified!
Long live the struggle of the Ecuadorian people!

Womanpuncher69

5y

read one of their pamphlets, think they mentioned they've done one before and failed, how much more popular are they now and how different is the circumstance from now to then ?