Man i used to hate duksi.

I see mukhtar b**** ass around here too still lol.

i really wonder if that day nsra and bshro and them convinced me to not go to canada changed my destination.

Lowkey the worst thing about being smli is the fact that the people will break you down so naturally

I feel absolutely terrible whenever i think about my youth. I feel so s***ty everytime i think about a lot of memories. If i was to explain this to my family i think they'd tell me to get over it and stop acting like i had it so bad. Now the thing is I know this is invalidating obviously but what if there's some truth to this? What if I'm just feeling too sorry for myself and I'm overexaggerating things in my head? I wish i could go back in time and relive some memories so i could properly process them. I think my default mentality in my youth was to just take things as face value and accept them. I never challenged anything or stopd up for myself in most situations. I suffered a lot in silence and never really understood why i felt the way i felt i think i just was programmed to take it to the chin and keep moving because nobody cares. But at the same time the few memories i do remember clearly i look back at them with the clarity i have now at my age and im like "wow that really happened and i didn't think anything of it" and Like understanding I have been gaslit my entire life and manipulated into ignoring my own emotions and needs and thinking its normal to be deprived was a pivotal moment in my mental growth. I feel like i understand that I need to listen to what myself thinks is best for myself instead of letting others interfere with that. I wish i could interview certain figures from my preteen years but almost all of them are gone and the rest are my family that is ultra biased. I can't trust their opinions for the most part. I just wanna know what's made me the way i am today

I think this is the first step of healing. I want to go to therapy and get so much of my trauma fixed.

not looking forward to this cobb transit

Really thinking of taking this thread to twitter hmm

Did they really just pull this job from under the rug

Well I'll see what this one today talking bout then I'll check up on what They wanna say tomorrow

don't think it went well. I was really shaky and nervous and stumbled quite a bit.

I really thought i was about to be free from these shackles. I guess not.

Going from on the path to making money to struggling to make a dollar

Got grilled in that mf wtf

so you invite me to interview for 1st role

Wanna tell me you wanna extend an offer

Tell me the position closed and isn't available anymore

Invite me To interview for 2nd role

Im clearly cooked

They tell me ok well in the interview you said wanted to grow to a 2nd role when i clearly meant growing into a bigger role

Then they ask me if I'm better fitted for 2nd role or first role and Let me know the first role was actually still open

So idk where i stand maybe they wanna decide whether to put me In 1st or 2nd role. Or maybe it was 2nd or nothing. I'm so confused

Shouldve known when he kept repeating how the role isn't advertised

I legit woke up and had no idea if it was 6am or 6pm

Got the job. 75k nigga talk to me

Istanbul nights !

Not finishing school coming back to bite me in the worst way mannnn Nobody to blame but myself tbh

No response from this email for 45 min bro. I need to know if I'm cooked or not

If vrnxt doesn't come thru im legit just gonna go to allied

Madeline gon kill me with this silence bro

I feel like my mind is too complicated to share it with someone

ALX I'M GOOD

Actually I'm still not convinced i can see this being rug pulled from me at any given moment. Ig wait it out until the end of the week.