Y’all ever came out of a therapy session feeling worse?

Like usually I’m feeling better about myself but idk I was mad today

Im not depressed or anything, but I swear I had like 3 mood changes in the past 30 minutes.

Bombed tf outta this test, was sad. Went to Chick Fil A, felt okay. Walked back home, saw this girl I used to talk to and got mad. I’d honestly slap tf outta her or push her into the mud. FBD. Got a call from my friend saying he wants to hang out and got happy again.

Never realized I had mood swings but my s*** has been fluctuating a LOT recently

I brought up the fact that I thought I had borderline personality disorder and my doctor completely blew it off

Today I accept that I will be bipolar for the rest of my life

It is a severe crippling mental illness

My life will always be hindered by this disease

I am disabled

I'm happy for u all being healthy not resorting to d**** or alcohol. I could never do it

I'm in grad school at a prestigious University

But I'm also psychotic 70% of the time

Today it became clear that this will not work for me

They said they'll try to help me. But as I listed off my past hospitalizations and explained my thoughts etc I realized this is futile

Idk what will become of me. I've seen it far off in the distance for a while but I fear death may be near

I haven't felt like this in years. I feel like I might need to go to a hospital before I do something rly dumb

hey , do you wanna talk ? we suffer from the same issues , I have a lot of lows but I find that my life has been much happier now ( which makes the lows feel specially harder )

Thank you, i mean I guess I just only feel sadness right now. And I love it. I feel like this is who I am. But I'm too old for this emo stuff

The world is starting to turn on me and because of my psychosis issues idk what other job I could do. Research is kinda made for reclusive nerds but it's so stressful and rn my brain just doesnt work

Idk if I just hate school or if I'm just in a bad mood.

this is a trick that I realized it works for me but its kind of stupid

I written on my iPhone wallpaper

"this is all temporary, you'll be better soon, don't worry"

and as weird as it sounds , it doesn't work everytime but it works a lot

is you reminding yourself to calm down , but it feels like another person is telling you

That's beautiful, I'll try to find something like that for my phone

I feel like for me it's not about losing track of myself, I'm very self aware it's kinda out of my control

its outta my control too , but physical stimulants also helped me a lot

go running , do some sports , go walking , if you have a girlfriend f*** the s*** outta her everytime you can , if you dont get tinder and lie a lot of how your perfectly normal and f*** there too , if you can't f*** do more sports

will it cure you ? hell no , but it will make you so tired your brain wont have energy to destroy you as much as it does now

I feel this

They just brought me to the realization that I'm very suicidal and f***ed up and now I'm starting to become obsessed

My problem is that my living is predicated on my brain having energy. All of those things just make my life harder. That's probably my issue actually cus I been on my coomer s*** lately (pause)

Probably should just b completely asexual

Tbh sexual s*** is the worst thing ever

I don't feel pleasure from it. It just makes me irritated. It ruined my f***ing day

I could never imagine f***ing it sounds f***ing horrible tbh

masturbation doesn't do you no good if you do it too much, and I masturbate a lot too

im older than you , already finished college and im working now

youll eventually find ways of making your life easier fam

i find pleasure in giving the other person pleasure , all my exes still stalk me from time to time because of that - you just have to find what makes you feel good

Idk why but s***has always just been so weird to me

I'm an adult and the idea of s***just seems wrong. I'm not even religious like that it just seems weird

Like whenever I've had the chance I just suddenly don't want to have anything to do with it

then f*** s***( ok this sounded weird ) , you'll find other things that give you pleasure dont push yourself to do something you're uncomfortable with

Lovely I like this. It's hard because I didn't understand this about myself until real recently. Even now idk

I never tried this , but a friend of mine that has problems similar to ours joined a group of people and they talk with each other about those things , he almost killed himself two years ago and was in a hospital for about a month but he's always traveling now and s*** so that must have worked for him , maybe it will work for you

Yea, im considering joining a group.

i have to go to sleep fam , but anything you need or just want to talk just @ me here or send me a message trough alpha

Thxs for the support brehh I rly appreciate it. Good luck to u