what's wrong with this forum b?

I can't help but wonder if it's my fault my boy died, or if I'm next

Having dark thoughts, jus thinking about how fragile life is

Not on no suicidal ahit just thinking about how d**** have ruined so many lives and I need to stop

I'm pretty sure we were the first ones to put him onto weed, then mxe, shrooms, after that he went on a molly binge, I lowkey cut him off and next thing I knew he overdosed

Between getting him into d**** and not being there for him I rly f***ed up

That s*** ruins lives man. Its so messed up. Worst part is I can't control my own use. I rly need to man up and quit

been finding it hard to engage since my taste in music is kinda niche and it’s seemingly difficult to generate discussion/interaction

psychiatrist prescribed me lexapro for depression and anxiety but im ironically really anxious to try it. I havent been on SSRIs before

defs a problem with having some niche tastes whadaya wanna talk about?

Hit slow point today.
I am so f***ing sad.
It’s my dad’s birthday
I called him and we had a talk and did not talk about my low point or how it’s going in my relationship.

I tried to keep the conversation light.
An hour later he wrote me and thanked me for the talk and wrote “Remember I love you”.
He saw right thru and knew I was low:(

I wanna try therapy

But there’s something about me that I don’t wanna share… it’s not a small thing, it’s very important and clearly the main reason I am the way I am… I just don’t wanna say it

So I wonder if it’s pointless and a waste of time, like I’m “cheating” therapy by omitting this important information (?)

movies

SSRIs goat

Praying that you can quit man, don’t blame yourself for what happened to your friend, going forward understand how damaging d**** can be and make sure to not pull others into d****, don’t blame yourself for it and I hope you can quit, it’s gonna be difficult at the start but you can do it.

Warm weather has hit my country and my mental can’t deal with it, I’m spiraling.

Me and my partner might break up because of it.
I’m all the way back in the hole, shades drawn on the windows, earplugs in block out all noise, trying to get away from my thoughts.
It’s bad

im so tired

therpy has been a life savr for me fr. If u really struggling atleast try it out once to see if its for u i didnt see any point in getting one but thnk goodness i did

Drownin' in this drink that look like potions
This s*** get me through the motions

I feel like s*** on adderall but I literally can’t stay off my phone without it

Ngl I got rly high off an edible yesterday, I think I accidentally inhaled some food and my chest itches like a mfer, been coughing a lot, hoping it doesn't get worse

im literally so bored i want to cry i dont even want a day off man just put me to work occupy my time please im dying over here

i think imma do this substance abuse program

struggling not to take too many pills

I don't know how to put how I feel into words anymore really. I think I'm just like really unhappy with how things have ended up and I don't see myself having the strength to make things any better.

I hope I can convince myself to just be done with it all soon. It's just hard I'm like scared of not knowing what happens after.

You are all wothy and deserving of happiness.

Been a rough few days and sometimes I feel like I'm more of a burden on everyone. I've gone through two therapists, a failed relationship, family loss, and a spin full of life changes over the past year. It's getting harder to think it's ever going to get better.

Check in on your friends, family, and loved ones. I just wish someone would do that for me without feeling like I'm actually vomiting up a mess of the bullshit that's been going on.

a bird just s***ted on me as i was walking to the gym. not sure what the consequences of this will be.