RASIE

4y

Imagine what society would be like if Dietrich's milkers came out in the 30s

Elric

4y

It should've been the beav

Fella

4y

da who, da what?

Galaxy de list mon

4y

Jus need 70s lists from:
@branmalt
@Bizzle
@basedspirit
@LuJo
@Jerry_Seinfeld
@RASIE
@Very_Based
@fuk_an_ad_lib (??)
@arel (??)
@woof (??)

RASIE

4y

@Galaxy I cant believe how close we are getting to possibly losing Thugger for years to come

lucid

4y

can i see mine real quick

lucid

4y

can i see mine real quick

Fella

4y

I still don’t know how you became a cinema expert this quickly. I’m unemployed and I don’t even have the time to do this s***, let alone also play like full RPG’s lmao.

Elric

4y

He's just an expert in general and has aimed his focus at cinema for the last half decade but before that it was music and other things

Elric

4y

He's also got a bougie administrator sugar daddy that let him watch 3 art films a day for most of that time. Same kind of cheat code I had when I just sold droogs and studied movies for a long ass time.

Have the same kind of full bore obsession mode probably

RASIE

4y

Lol yeah i knew i was looking in the mirror when i first plugged in the archive and saw the file organization

It's not just the sugar daddy tho, i mean it is, but like if we actually wanted to have kids all of that would go bye-bye. He makes enough money for just us 2 and the dogs to live without worrying much about money each month and maybe go on a short vacation each year.

And since June last year when i had to leave my job at the hospital in georgia when we moved, i have now been feeling less fulfilled throughout the week by not having a steady routine, which i why i started applying like crazy two weeks ago as soon as we won the bid on our house.

Plus i want to make my own money again to help contribute to our lifestyle. Our mortgage is higher now, and i'm gonna need a new car within the next year. And we're trying to go to Japan later this year too, and i wanna make sure we (or I) have enough money to buy as many cheap retro games as i can there

Elric

4y

Jk we all know you guys are basically married and you're plenty capable on your own :elon: hard to really dive into the history if you're working full time though and were both lucky to have had those phases even if we could have been adulting a little more

RASIE

4y

I don't feel right calling myself an expert on anything, because i always feel like there's still so much more to learn about whatever subject im focused on.

But i will say that i feel some type of way about how you just wrote one sentence that sums up the 30 paragraph reply i just posted

RASIE

4y

Well i was technically unemployed for like the first 3-4 years of diving into film too haha, and definitely slowed wayyyy down after getting a proper job. Then over the past year or so all the constant moving and stress that came with it burnt me out and i was never in the mood to watch any films, and was playing a lot more games or just watching YouTube in my free time — which are the two "turn my brain off" things i enjoy the most, even though they can sometimes easily takeover way more of my time than I'd like.

I've always been the kind of person who discovers a general subject I like and then puts 200% of my focus into it for years until i feel satisfied, or until something else comes along that grabs my interest enough to steal the spotlignt. My grandpa always talks about how i was like that as a kid, where I would find something i really liked and i would spend all my time and breathe learning/talking about it, and then moving on when I found something else to take its place. But i never really recognized that about myself until college when i got into literature, and then later music.

And then when i got into film (including reading about film), that took over music's role in my life. I mean those first few years i was watching 500-600 films a year on average, on top of constantly finding and reading books about film history, criticism, and directors. (And having tons of free time and an extremely abnormal sleeping schedule are definitely contributing factors.)

That's also why since like 2016 i have barely kept up with new music each year the way i used to, outside of like the same 5 or 6 current artists i really love. It's crazy going to the OG KTT and seeing those "best albums of 2015" type threads and how many albums from each year i listened to. Ii cant even name 10 albums that dropped last year off the top of my head

I'm only able to actually learn and retain information when I dedicate myself to one, maybe two primary things at a time (mostly just one tho). And i'm also able to learn bits and pieces about other subjects from these primary things, like how i learned about criticism/theory and philosophy from literature, which translated seamlessly when i got into music and its history (and my time with literature helped me bettef appreciate albums as a text).

And all those things have carried over just as much into my focus on film, and i've just added more info about those things with each big primary focus. Idk if i've just gotten extremely lucky that all the things i've dedicated my time to over the years contribute value to each other, or if there would naturally be a kind of continually increasing thread of knowledge regardless of what subject I'm into.

I suppose learning about new subjects is like what I do instead of d****/alcohol. It takes over my life without me even realizing it and i cant really resist losing myself in learning as much as i can about something for years at a time.

And this website has also played a big role in that, unexpectedly. Like the past 7-8 years on here, especially since the conception of Fam Thread, have been an invaluable source of community and discussion that has helped me find out new things about whatever topic im diving into. I will never think of the time i've spent shooting the s*** with you guys in here as wasted because of that. I really have no shame in saying that you guys in here have genuinely become my really good friends.

I've always told my husband that if money wasn't such a factor in our lives, then I would probably just want to enroll in different graduate programs for the rest of my life, spending 4-6 years at a time learning everything about one subject at a time. I wouldn't even do anything with my degrees like find a great job with what i've learned (again, if money wasn't a factor). I'd be perfectly content just learning new stuff.

RASIE

4y

Well i was technically unemployed for like the first 3-4 years of diving into film too haha, and definitely slowed wayyyy down after getting a proper job. Then over the past year or so all the constant moving and stress that came with it burnt me out and i was never in the mood to watch any films, and was playing a lot more games or just watching YouTube in my free time — which are the two "turn my brain off" things i enjoy the most, even though they can sometimes easily takeover way more of my time than I'd like.

I've always been the kind of person who discovers a general subject I like and then puts 200% of my focus into it for years until i feel satisfied, or until something else comes along that grabs my interest enough to steal the spotlignt. My grandpa always talks about how i was like that as a kid, where I would find something i really liked and i would spend all my time and breathe learning/talking about it, and then moving on when I found something else to take its place. But i never really recognized that about myself until college when i got into literature, and then later music.

And then when i got into film (including reading about film), that took over music's role in my life. I mean those first few years i was watching 500-600 films a year on average, on top of constantly finding and reading books about film history, criticism, and directors. (And having tons of free time and an extremely abnormal sleeping schedule are definitely contributing factors.)

That's also why since like 2016 i have barely kept up with new music each year the way i used to, outside of like the same 5 or 6 current artists i really love. It's crazy going to the OG KTT and seeing those "best albums of 2015" type threads and how many albums from each year i listened to. Ii cant even name 10 albums that dropped last year off the top of my head

I'm only able to actually learn and retain information when I dedicate myself to one, maybe two primary things at a time (mostly just one tho). And i'm also able to learn bits and pieces about other subjects from these primary things, like how i learned about criticism/theory and philosophy from literature, which translated seamlessly when i got into music and its history (and my time with literature helped me bettef appreciate albums as a text).

And all those things have carried over just as much into my focus on film, and i've just added more info about those things with each big primary focus. Idk if i've just gotten extremely lucky that all the things i've dedicated my time to over the years contribute value to each other, or if there would naturally be a kind of continually increasing thread of knowledge regardless of what subject I'm into.

I suppose learning about new subjects is like what I do instead of d****/alcohol. It takes over my life without me even realizing it and i cant really resist losing myself in learning as much as i can about something for years at a time.

And this website has also played a big role in that, unexpectedly. Like the past 7-8 years on here, especially since the conception of Fam Thread, have been an invaluable source of community and discussion that has helped me find out new things about whatever topic im diving into. I will never think of the time i've spent shooting the s*** with you guys in here as wasted because of that. I really have no shame in saying that you guys in here have genuinely become my really good friends.

I've always told my husband that if money wasn't such a factor in our lives, then I would probably just want to enroll in different graduate programs for the rest of my life, spending 4-6 years at a time learning everything about one subject at a time. I wouldn't even do anything with my degrees like find a great job with what i've learned (again, if money wasn't a factor). I'd be perfectly content just learning new stuff.

Elric

4y

you just have such an academic way of looking at things compared to most of us dummies

rvi

4y

Strong autism special interest vibes tbh

Not saying you have it or anything but that's how I am with music. Hard to see it ever switching to something else though tbh. Maybe when I'm like 40 I'll undertake the full obsession into film

RASIE

4y

I dont think its autism (not anything wrong with that either), just because im pretty sure it's a byproduct of a bad social anxiety i developed in college.

A lot of my friends in high school were older than me and when i went to the same college as some of them, there came the time where they graduated and moved away, and i was still there by myself and had to get my own apartment with a random perpon. And I was suddenly hot with the realization that i had basically lived in a social paradise for the past 6 years and rarely ever made new friends because i never really needed to.

So i didnt really remember how to actually meet new friends by myself, and didnt even know how to meet people outside the context of "we grew up together".

And as a result i went from being a big bar hopping party person, to someone who stayed in my apartment/room all day and just threw myself into my schoolwork and started learning about things like crazy.

Then when i was done with school, i moved into a house with the band guy i found on craigslist and by some miracle we really got along, but even while living there i would stay in my bedroom the majority of the time reading or listening to music. I could go to a gig and talk to people about the band unless i had a few drinks when i got there.

It wasnt until years later after i had been dating my husband for a couple years — who is literally the "hey everyody look at me" person in a crowd and can talk to a stranger in line at the store for 45 mins — that i actually started recovering from that time of anxiety. And nowadays i have no problem with meeting new people and making friends again. I will strike up conversations with strangers or people we meet through our other friends all the time now.

And when the anxiety left, i guess the "learning about stuff is my heroin" aspect of it stuck around, which im really thankful for tbh

Fella

4y

This is really interesting. In a way I’m sort of jealous. I never can stay focused on something I like for too long, my interests will shift to something else too fast. A month or two ago I was super into comics and I’m already burnt out on that medium. I moved back over to film but then I’ll get into something super specific like Italian cop movies or some other sub genre. Then my focus shifts to music. Like currently I’m really into power pop. It honestly sucks because this effects anything I’m talented at. I’ve never properly learned any particular instrument but I can dabble with piano or percussion. I like writing lyrics and singing but I’m not great at either. I never got good enough or interested enough in any particular subject to pick a major in college, I didn't go altogether for that reason among many others. I’m like an aimless person constantly interested in different things like a kid in a candy store but never can fully become an expert on a subject or a master at any skill.

Fella

4y

Maybe they’re on to something with that cause every autistic person I know writes like 20 paragraph responses to everything. I like your writing and detailed explanations so it’s all good.

RASIE

4y

I have also never been able to learn an instrument despite always wanting to. Same with learning another language. God i have tried that so many times and i cannot do it. I want to so badly.

But i don't think the way you approach stuff sucks fam. I think you have created a lot of that fear of it meaning you'll "never being talented or good at a skill" and you're scared that's your actual reality, but it's really not man.

Look at how you approach film. You have always been obsessed with a few specific genres of film, and you've hunted down tons of random, lesser known stuff from those genres. That takes a lot of focus and willpower. I couldn't laser in on specific categories of a field like that, i would give up after a couple days and watch something else lol.

I know you really like Mike Thorn too, and look at him. Dude has dedicated almost all of his time with film to horror and genre movies. And he's super intelligent and talented. And you also have increasingly improved your writing skills over the years, and you're reviews have been increasingly enjoyable to read.

You just like to jump around in what you spend time with. And I also think
that you had a day job or something, even one you don't give a s*** about, to give you a routine every few days or so, i think you feel a lot less aimless and a lot more content with how you approach the things you have a passion for. But i know you got injured bad a couple years ago so i don't know if thats even an option for you at the moment.

You can be extremely passionate about things and not translate that into practical skill or life stability. And that's okay. And once you accept that it's perfectly fine to just explore things you're passionate about or entertained by, without having any endgame to become an "expert" in them or make them your trade, then you can get on with enjoying yourself more.

I know all that sounds cliche or corny or insincere. No fam. I felt the same way as you. I literally went into debt in order to get a degree that ultimately became an excuse for me to learn about a small amount of literature and general criticism. Then i became a guy who slept 15 hours a day and played xbox, listened to music, and smoked 2 packs of cigarettes a day while mostly living off my mom's money, and randomly stumbling into things every now and then that made me some extra money.

Then i f***ed a guy on grindr, went on a date with him a whole two months later, and ended up being a 1950s ass "homemaker" for the next 7 years of my life.

I felt aimless as s***. I had no translatable job experience (seminar work, half-assedly managing a band for a roommate, and being a creative consultant for a friend's texh startup, are surprisingly not what the labor world would call "skills"). I begrudgingly took a front desk job at my husband's hospital — the nepotism only further confirmed my feelings of hopeless dependence. But then something clicked in my head one day, and i just started being happy having a job. Which led to me getting a different job on my own.

And i was able to actually enjoy having a job because i never let that aimless dread affect the things i had a passion for in my free time (which had mostly been "all the time" up until my job). I had accepted long ago that i was fine just learning about things and not actually doing something with it to earn a living. The "find a job you love doing and not a 9-5 blackhole" cat poster advice is misleading.

A video i always felt inspired by, sometimes to the point of tears in my lowest moments, is the clip of James Murphy in that LCD documentary where he talks about how he always felt like a failure in his early 20s because he wasn't actually doing anything with his life. And it wasn't until he was 26 when he realized that's its fine to not be doing anything with your life, and getting caught up in the feeling that you have to do something with your life is what paralyzed him and actually made him not do anything.

And to my surprise, i had a chat with my mother a couple years ago where i was telling her how she imparted all these amazing qualities of being nice and generous to others onto me and my brother at early ages. But also that i didnt know why it took me near the end of my 20s to finally adopt her trait that i saw the most every single day: her incredible ambition to work and be independent. I mean she started at a big company's call center answering phones for angry people with insurance claims, and she eventually became an executive at said company and is extremely successful, on top of having like 8 personal hobbies she spends tons of time doing.

And she looked at me confused as hell and said "Honey, i didn't even start working at the call center until I was 29 years old. Until then i was working part time at Arby's and living off grandpa's help. You didn't take a long time to adopt that trait at all. You're right on time and i was never worried about that."

Basically reassured me that my mom is in fact James Murphy and also how stupid i was for feeling so useless throughout my early and mid 20s.

You're gonna be alright man.

Fella

4y

Man you have me crying. This means a lot. You wrote a lot and it all feels important and well thought out and you just seamlessly communicated a ton. It’s like this weight feeling that simultaneously makes me feel alright and content but also passionate to move forward to and do better. Thanks man. You rock.