My last question is what separates ideology from philosophy regularly economics and politics

yeah ironically the way ur going at it rn wont help u at all, without sleep ur brain wouldn't be able to store all the information ur learning and you'll forget it bringing u to that depressive state that ur trying to avoid by rushing through all this.

dont worry about being unintelligent cause I guarantee u someone feels like that compared to u, I've been reading theory and s*** since I was 16, so like 5 years now and while I might be intelligent to others, I know for fact im unintelligent to some posters in here, its all relative. Also dont ever feel that ur too dumb to understand these concepts, cause I promise u arent just by the fact that ur literate, if Ho Chi Minh and Mao were able to describe these concepts to illiterate farmers and they were able to understand them through their live experiences, I know you can for sure. The important thing is that ur learning, learning these concepts just so u can outdebate or outsmart someone else would be an absolute waste of time, philosophers have already interpreted the world in many ways, the point of marxism is to change it.

Also I would recommend joining a uni socialist club, or a leftist book reading club, reading in groups might help you understand even better than u would isolated, and yeah I know leftist book clubs are memed now but if they help u get into it, no shame in getting to them. Hopefully eventually you'd be more comfortable in actual political organising, protesting, ecoterrorism, assassinations, mutual aid etc .

also this channel has been shared here before but im a link it again its great for learning basic concepts, the problem with bread tube lie philosophytube is that nowadays they're more entrainment than education

youtube.com/channel/UCNalGyK3DaK37GTLIHSwmyA

not sure if I totally understand ur question but nothing ideology and philosophy are usually used to justify economic and political structures

I didn’t even know mao was actually out her teaching farmers that’s actually inspiring. My heart always been into this I just never knew where I identified or how to express my feelings I just knew I had a bitterness since my mom was subject to racial inequality at her job and essentially been unemployed since I was in middle school they treated her less than a woman and had her scraping for fair wage it breaks my heart and overall I just want to be able to help society as a whole. I’m not the most literate and due to me being in the hood my education wasn’t the best my teachers didn’t take the time to make me feel as though I had worth academically adding that just having overall anxiety and paranoia made me struggle to keep focus im just now trying to make sense of everything around me. Socialist book club actually sounds great would I have to join college in order to get involved?

Man my whole introduction to this was breadtube I thought the video a***ysis aspect of it was intriguing but it seems as though you need prior knowledge in those subjects in order to fully enjoy those vids

Oh I just meant why does the terms political philosophy exists when there’s political science

hmm would depend on the area around u, my uni just got one this year, and im taking the year off due to personal situation, and they still let me join maybe due to me being a former student. Sorry to hear about that with ur mom, I know how that feels, I grew up poor too and my mom was struggling working a brutal factory job to take care of three kids on her own. Even know me and my bros go out we been hearing more racial slurs, and when I worked in a factory I would have fresh off the boat coworkers who'd express me that they were scared of reporting racist coworkers or that their labour laws being abused due to fear of deportation.

the usual go to understanding communism is usually start off with Marx and Engels, the problem here is that imo there work is very academically written and quite boring due to their writing style. Compared to Mao guess him going to teacher college before also helps cause, wrote a lot of his work so it can be understood by common people. Reading his work feels like reading beautifully written poetry, he's a great writer even without the context of the ideas behind them, and he makes them very easily understandable. Lenin too his writings has his personality bleeding through them, reading him you kinda just get this sense of some smart a****** that just likes s***ting on Kautsky and Bernstein, and even within the anarchist tradition you can feel Kropotkin love for humanity bleed through his writing. Meanwhile Engels and Marx just read like boring old academia. So maybe for you reading Mao as a starting point might be best.

The whole thing with bread tube is that many communist dont really f*** with them anymore after all bread tube comes from the anarchist book Conquest of Bread, but even then I find that Anarchist dont either. Breadtube started off as basically debunking right wing talking points, so the people that enjoy that content can fall under from communists to liberals, and over time Breadtube has been pulled into the liberal direction, due to many factors like breadtube creators having to make content that due best on the algorithm which tends to be culture war bs, some of the creators never really being radicals in the first place, I dont think Contrapoints even read much Marx in the first place, overt focus on media a***ysis and a lot other factors. Doesnt mean you cant watch Breadtube go ahead, I still watch them as well I love Hbomberguy and Contrapoints still, but dont expect to learn much about Marxism from them. I'll link some amazing channels if u want educational content though.

youtube.com/c/ComradeLenin
youtube.com/c/MarxistPaul
youtube.com/c/SecondThought
youtube.com/c/YUGOPNIK

id say just take your time

you're in no rush and it's just one of those things that you absorb over time through osmosis of what you're learning about currently.

same thing w music, you didn't start knowing what shoegaze and memphis rap was it's just something you will learn naturally through the process of being interested in it

you got this man you've shown more dedication just in this thread by asking for help which is more than most people can muster.

most socialist revolutions have been conducted by the masses in impoverished rural countries with very low literacy rates, and the fact is that the US education system is very lacking and possibly even intentionally so to make comprehending concepts like material dialectics uncompelling.

just keep at it and take it slow. the most important thing imo is to read books that inspire you. im reading Are Prisons Obsolete by Angela Davis rn and it is really interesting to get all this hard data and a***ysis of the prison industrial complex and the ways in which it continues to exploit communities today. almost finished the book in 2 days just cuz the information is so interesting.

lol im reading this book rn too

also dawg i learned so much just by using reddit and going through /r/communism101 and /r/communism .. just osmosis..

I'm probably being overly sectarian but I tend to stay off reddit communism sites

Got banned on /r/socialism for using the word retärdéd
Got banned on /r/communism for defending Iran in the context of US aggression
Both subs are wack as f***

Communism101 is good though

GenZedong is the only good communist subreddit that’s explicitly dedicated to communism

Socialism 101 is great too

Well yeah you can’t be using that slur idk what u expected

R/communism is a bunch of dogmatists tho

F*** language policing

GenZedong has some Dengism I don't agree with but their meme making skills are good

Eh the dengism I can deal with, they give some healthy criticism at times

But r/communism had ppl defending Kampuchea and The Shining Path

Mainly hang on catsaysmao or Twitter

It's better if you say Khmer Rouge because the People's Republic of Kampuchea (the guys who overthrew Pol Pot) weren't that bad

“Some dengism” that whole sub is just d***riding China and anyone who is anti-US. Saw some pro taliban posts on there smh

I'm against Dengoids but I was on a server of /r/AntiDengism or something and they were the biggest leftcom retärds I saw

Ultimately the discussion culture on reddit is just wack

I cannot take anyone serious who thinks that value can only be represented in money, or who thinks that value will not exist under socialism. But this is what many leftcoms and "post-Marxists" think. Fortunately, they are irrelevant.

I agree those subreddits suck / have bad takes. I also have been banned from them lol
But IMO they're ok for a beginner to learn the basics and vocabulary