i want to be a better person

i really hope there’s more to life than this

im so delusional

Nah

you’ll be surprised

people get into a relationship for the wrong reasons that they think is right to them

ehhh it depends honestly. ive been in both but loneliness always feels like s***

imma genuinely kill myself lmao

im tired of coronavirus im tired of hearing people talk about it im tired of the government not giving a f***

im tired of people in general

i hate society and humans in general so much rn iwanna just off myself and be free from everyone

There's times where it's like I don't want to die but almost just not exist if that makes any sense. This past week has legit been one of the worst of my life from a mental health standpoint and I just keep trying to remind myself that if I'm not here anymore I won't get to experience my life get better which I desperately want. I want to be happy and enjoy life so badly. That's pretty much the one thing keeping me going rn

I realized I really need to work on envy and comparing myself with other people, it's causing me a lot of inner turmoil and distress. Like I'll see someone in a much better situation than mine or look at someone I idolize and not hate them or dislike them for it but just wish it was me and that my life could be more like theirs. S*** needs to stop it's not healthy

been sleeping for like 2 to 5 hours at a time recently and at weird times

guess im manic or something idk I still wanna die

wake up feeling suicidal and I go to sleep feeling suicidal

Therapist is worried I'm gonna become suicidal soon

I'm at like 6 rn rapidly approaching 9 and this time I don't see anything saving me

I'd rather not know I'm going to kill myself before I do it but f*** man here we are

I got a 1200 bill from the mental hospital so my mentality is next time I'll just keep quiet do it and end this f***ery

never am I telling the psych im suicidal again