how come
u should get up take a shower and brush your teeth bro nothing better than those feelings on a s***ty day

I just got done with a shower.

I'm just broken and can't make anything of myself. I want to try to succeed but it would be for nothing

that’s not true and you know it.
don’t ever give up! if something isn’t work keep trying and try harder and harder and harder

My first suicide attempt was a year and a half ago

I would've missed music I found and a couple close friendships being made and lost. Can't say I've made much advancement since then

does not one person f***ing care? not even fake care

this is honestly sad

F*** my entire existence I should've died a while ago

There’s always more to do and to experience
Just keep trying
It’s worth it

Guys how do i stop f***ing living in the past

After highschool i went thru a pretty traumatic even and had to move like 6 states away and i feel its just been a wound that’s been festering and causing so much toxic s*** in my head

I want to address it and i wish I could connect to f***ing anything just to get rid of this s*** man

Feeling disconnected from my present life cus im stuck in past, feeling disconnected from the place i call home cus i moved, feeling disconnected from people i grew up with, feeling disconnected from my own family

Wouldnt wish this on anyone feels like torture i just wish my f***ing brain was normal

😣 this how i feel

wanna kill myself

meditate bro

You ever hesitate to message someone you haven't talked to in a while, end up messaging them, and regret messaging them because they don't reply? It's not a good position to be in if you're a guy trying to better himself. It's a self-esteem destroyer.

force yourself into new circumstances that demand your attenion

you won't have time to dwell, the present will demand too much from you emotionally, mentally, and physically

speaking from exp. in regards to what you said

rent a movie on youtube to relax.

uncle and father talk through the entire movie.

this is my family. hopefully i can get away from these people eventually.

Yea that worked for me but this lockdown and being home everyday a week has set me back really bad

Just sitting here w all the time in the word for my anxieties to kick in

this s*** sucks

It’s not your fault bro maybe their busy or something

Make a commitment to something by investing some money in it, if you f*** it up you'll be stressed over wasting your money (hooks you into it)

Could be anything, easiest thing is an online class this summer in something you're actually into. Drop 500 on it upfront and you'll def be trying to make the most of money spent. Do it at a good university too, right now they're offering classes online during the summer which they would NEVER do otherwise.

Just an example. If you have other interests think about how you'd bind yourself into it so you don't have so much free time.

i want to numb all pain receptors and just scrape all my skin off for hours with a dull knife to some music

that’s not a bad way to go out at all