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  • Oct 17, 2022
    ·
    2 replies
    RocMarci

    I do not blame anyone who kills themselves. It’s all so complicated. I wish I had the courage to do it myself. I’ll forever understand someone who’s too scared to talk about it and ends everything once and for all. One last moment in the sun

    A CONFESSION BY LEO TOLSTOY
    The book is a brief autobiographical story of the author's struggle with a mid-life existential crisis. It describes his search for the answer to the ultimate philosophical question: "If God does not exist, since death is inevitable, what is the meaning of life?." Without the answer to this, for him, life had become "impossible".

    The story begins with the Eastern fable of the dragon in the well. A man is chased by a beast into a well, at the bottom of which is a dragon. The man clings to a branch that is being gnawed on by two mice (one black, one white, representing night and day and the relentless march of time). The man is able to lick two drops of honey (representing Tolstoy's love of his family and his writing), but because death is inevitable, he no longer finds the honey sweet.

    Tolstoy goes on to describe four possible attitudes towards this dilemma. The first is ignorance. If one is oblivious to the fact that death is approaching, life becomes bearable. The problem with this for him personally is that he is not ignorant. Having become conscious of the reality of death, there is no going back.

    The second possibility is what Tolstoy describes as Epicureanism. Being fully aware that life is ephemeral, one can enjoy the time one has. Tolstoy's problem with this is essentially moral. He states that Epicureanism may work fine and well for the minority who can afford to live "the good life," but one would have to be morally empty to be able to ignore the fact that the vast majority of people do not have access to the wealth necessary to live this kind of life.

    Tolstoy next states that the most intellectually honest response to the situation would be suicide. In the face of the inevitability of death and assuming that God does not exist, why wait? Why pretend that this vale of tears means anything when one can just cut to the chase? For himself, however, Tolstoy writes that he is “too cowardly” to follow through on this most “logically consistent” response.

    Finally, Tolstoy says that the fourth option, the one he is taking, is the one of just holding on; living “despite the absurdity of it,” because he is not willing “or able” to do anything else. So it seems “utterly hopeless” - at least “without God”.

    So Tolstoy turns to the question of God's existence: After despairing of his attempts to find answers in classic philosophical arguments for the existence of God (e.g. the Cosmological Argument, which reasons that God must exist based on the need to ascribe an original cause to the universe), Tolstoy turns to a more mystical, intuitive affirmation of God's presence. He states that as soon as he said "God is Life," life was once again suffused with meaning. This faith could be interpreted as a Kierkegaardian leap, but Tolstoy actually seems to be describing a more Eastern approach to what God is. The identification of God with life suggests a more monistic (or panentheistic) metaphysic characteristic of Eastern religions, and this is why] rational arguments ultimately fall short of establishing God's existence. Tolstoy's original title for this work indicates as much, and his own personal "conversion" is suggested by an epilogue that describes a dream he had some time after completing the body of the text, confirming that he had undergone a radical personal and spiritual transformation.

  • Oct 17, 2022
    nonviolence

    A CONFESSION BY LEO TOLSTOY
    The book is a brief autobiographical story of the author's struggle with a mid-life existential crisis. It describes his search for the answer to the ultimate philosophical question: "If God does not exist, since death is inevitable, what is the meaning of life?." Without the answer to this, for him, life had become "impossible".

    The story begins with the Eastern fable of the dragon in the well. A man is chased by a beast into a well, at the bottom of which is a dragon. The man clings to a branch that is being gnawed on by two mice (one black, one white, representing night and day and the relentless march of time). The man is able to lick two drops of honey (representing Tolstoy's love of his family and his writing), but because death is inevitable, he no longer finds the honey sweet.

    Tolstoy goes on to describe four possible attitudes towards this dilemma. The first is ignorance. If one is oblivious to the fact that death is approaching, life becomes bearable. The problem with this for him personally is that he is not ignorant. Having become conscious of the reality of death, there is no going back.

    The second possibility is what Tolstoy describes as Epicureanism. Being fully aware that life is ephemeral, one can enjoy the time one has. Tolstoy's problem with this is essentially moral. He states that Epicureanism may work fine and well for the minority who can afford to live "the good life," but one would have to be morally empty to be able to ignore the fact that the vast majority of people do not have access to the wealth necessary to live this kind of life.

    Tolstoy next states that the most intellectually honest response to the situation would be suicide. In the face of the inevitability of death and assuming that God does not exist, why wait? Why pretend that this vale of tears means anything when one can just cut to the chase? For himself, however, Tolstoy writes that he is “too cowardly” to follow through on this most “logically consistent” response.

    Finally, Tolstoy says that the fourth option, the one he is taking, is the one of just holding on; living “despite the absurdity of it,” because he is not willing “or able” to do anything else. So it seems “utterly hopeless” - at least “without God”.

    So Tolstoy turns to the question of God's existence: After despairing of his attempts to find answers in classic philosophical arguments for the existence of God (e.g. the Cosmological Argument, which reasons that God must exist based on the need to ascribe an original cause to the universe), Tolstoy turns to a more mystical, intuitive affirmation of God's presence. He states that as soon as he said "God is Life," life was once again suffused with meaning. This faith could be interpreted as a Kierkegaardian leap, but Tolstoy actually seems to be describing a more Eastern approach to what God is. The identification of God with life suggests a more monistic (or panentheistic) metaphysic characteristic of Eastern religions, and this is why] rational arguments ultimately fall short of establishing God's existence. Tolstoy's original title for this work indicates as much, and his own personal "conversion" is suggested by an epilogue that describes a dream he had some time after completing the body of the text, confirming that he had undergone a radical personal and spiritual transformation.

    Sounds interesting

  • Oct 17, 2022

    I hate school so much but I don’t know what else to do. One of my profs is a b**** with a stick up her ass and I have her for two classes. Then I got two classes with stats and I’m fckin s*** at that. My last two classes are alright even though one of them doesn’t have any structure. This quarter sucks so much

  • Oct 17, 2022

  • Oct 17, 2022
    ·
    1 reply


    ktt posting

  • Oct 17, 2022
    nonviolence

    A CONFESSION BY LEO TOLSTOY
    The book is a brief autobiographical story of the author's struggle with a mid-life existential crisis. It describes his search for the answer to the ultimate philosophical question: "If God does not exist, since death is inevitable, what is the meaning of life?." Without the answer to this, for him, life had become "impossible".

    The story begins with the Eastern fable of the dragon in the well. A man is chased by a beast into a well, at the bottom of which is a dragon. The man clings to a branch that is being gnawed on by two mice (one black, one white, representing night and day and the relentless march of time). The man is able to lick two drops of honey (representing Tolstoy's love of his family and his writing), but because death is inevitable, he no longer finds the honey sweet.

    Tolstoy goes on to describe four possible attitudes towards this dilemma. The first is ignorance. If one is oblivious to the fact that death is approaching, life becomes bearable. The problem with this for him personally is that he is not ignorant. Having become conscious of the reality of death, there is no going back.

    The second possibility is what Tolstoy describes as Epicureanism. Being fully aware that life is ephemeral, one can enjoy the time one has. Tolstoy's problem with this is essentially moral. He states that Epicureanism may work fine and well for the minority who can afford to live "the good life," but one would have to be morally empty to be able to ignore the fact that the vast majority of people do not have access to the wealth necessary to live this kind of life.

    Tolstoy next states that the most intellectually honest response to the situation would be suicide. In the face of the inevitability of death and assuming that God does not exist, why wait? Why pretend that this vale of tears means anything when one can just cut to the chase? For himself, however, Tolstoy writes that he is “too cowardly” to follow through on this most “logically consistent” response.

    Finally, Tolstoy says that the fourth option, the one he is taking, is the one of just holding on; living “despite the absurdity of it,” because he is not willing “or able” to do anything else. So it seems “utterly hopeless” - at least “without God”.

    So Tolstoy turns to the question of God's existence: After despairing of his attempts to find answers in classic philosophical arguments for the existence of God (e.g. the Cosmological Argument, which reasons that God must exist based on the need to ascribe an original cause to the universe), Tolstoy turns to a more mystical, intuitive affirmation of God's presence. He states that as soon as he said "God is Life," life was once again suffused with meaning. This faith could be interpreted as a Kierkegaardian leap, but Tolstoy actually seems to be describing a more Eastern approach to what God is. The identification of God with life suggests a more monistic (or panentheistic) metaphysic characteristic of Eastern religions, and this is why] rational arguments ultimately fall short of establishing God's existence. Tolstoy's original title for this work indicates as much, and his own personal "conversion" is suggested by an epilogue that describes a dream he had some time after completing the body of the text, confirming that he had undergone a radical personal and spiritual transformation.

    about to spin this

  • Oct 17, 2022
    PainPapi


    ktt posting

    Literally

  • Oct 17, 2022

    I'm so damn burnt out from my job. I wonder if my coworkers and supervisor notice.

  • Oct 18, 2022
    ·
    1 reply

    taking my meds just so I can knockout to get this night over with

  • Oct 18, 2022

    Man, 'beating' depression really is a full-time job. I've been struggling with these thoughts for a full decade now. Tried everything under the sun to combat it - and have managed to successfully find what helps me. But f*** me it's exhausting, the effort and toll it takes to maintain those habits and what not. Not to mention knowing that no matter what there's always another crash awaiting at some point. It's just inevitable. You just wonder why the f*** am I picking myself up yet again and going through all this heavy-lifting when I know the result is one and the same regardless.

    And now Winter is approaching.

  • Oct 18, 2022

    Getting help for this is jungle.
    I feel I just gets thrown from person to person.
    I am so confused
    Feels like my personality is gone or fading.

  • 6isco 🦈
    Oct 18, 2022
    ·
    1 reply

    sometimes I really just question offing myself and hope reincarnation is real so I can at least have a new brain

  • Oct 19, 2022
    BVL

    taking my meds just so I can knockout to get this night over with

    I do this when im excited for next day or something that comes out next day its probably not a good thing to do but i do it

  • Oct 19, 2022
    ·
    1 reply
    6isco

    sometimes I really just question offing myself and hope reincarnation is real so I can at least have a new brain

    but what if its eternal darkness and u r left just remembering everything from the past and ur stuck there and cannot move and cannot fix anything.

  • Oct 19, 2022

    its like every time i have a responsibility and opportunity I purposely sabotage myself

  • 6isco 🦈
    Oct 19, 2022
    CutiePieHole

    but what if its eternal darkness and u r left just remembering everything from the past and ur stuck there and cannot move and cannot fix anything.

    nooo

  • Oct 19, 2022
    ·
    1 reply

    I AM POSSESED

  • Oct 20, 2022
    Drogon

    I AM POSSESED

  • Oct 21, 2022

    Been down bad lately

  • Oct 21, 2022
    ·
    1 reply

    i need a bandaid on my brain

  • Oct 22, 2022

    Kill me

  • Oct 22, 2022

    life is extremely frustrating, i don’t wanna deal w this s*** anymore